Solo female traveling is my love language. Truly. I fell in love with travel fresh out of college, when I was 21-years-old, and embarked on my first solo trip ever. I went to Ghana for 3 months, which- in hindsight- was a pretty big first time trip alone. But that’s how I do things. I’m an all or nothing kinda girl.
I’m 35 now, and I haven’t stopped traveling since. It’s in my blood. Like even if I wanted to, I can’t, because it’s just…me.
That’s not to say that I’ve been alone for all of my gallivanting around the world, because I’ve done it all: traveled with friends, boyfriends, and now my wife and our dog. Yes, our dog is an international girlie, too, which is my favorite thing EVER.
My travel style, budget, and preferences have changed massively since going from a shoestring backpacker to a soon-to-be mom. But there have been lessons along the way that I’m certain will stick with me for a lifetime. And those lessons are exactly what I plan on sharing here today.
This post will cover the benefits of solo travel, as well as 5 crucial tips for solo female travelers to keep in mind as they globetrot. I hope you learn from both my triumphs and my mistakes.
But most of all, I hope you have a lot of fun along the way.
Benefits of Solo Travel
Look, I’m not saying I don’t like traveling with other people. Because I’ve had some unforgettable times with different travel companions along the way. But there’s some certain kind of magic that occurs when you travel solo that just can’t be replicated in a group setting.
Confidence
All travel builds confidence, whether you’re traveling alone or in a group. Think about it like this: when you go out to eat alone, versus in a group- you’ll have a very different experience. You’re doing the same activity, but the dynamic is quite different. Chances are, you’re more nervous to go to eat alone. And oftentimes, not always, but oftentimes the other side of those nerves is confidence.
The same thing goes for traveling in general, versus on your own. When you’re on your own, the only one to depend on is YOU. Which can be equally empowering, and scary. Don’t worry, once we dive into the tips, you’ll feel a lot more prepared in how to tackle your next solo trip.
Freedom
The most liberating thing about traveling solo is the freedom that comes along with it. You don’t have to wait on anyone else to get ready, or listen to anyone else’s opinions about which sites to see. You get to make all of the choices in your own way and time.
Again, this might sound overwhelming for some people- especially if you’re used to being guided by others, and not making your own choices. It might take a few days, or even weeks, to get used to. But once you taste that freedom, it’s really hard going back. Trust me.
Plus, this contributes to the whole confidence building element, which we love.
Clarity
In order to achieve real clarity when traveling solo, it’s also important to check in with how connected you are to others virtually, as well. You can go somewhere on your own, but if you’re glued to your phone the whole time, or facetiming your partner every five minutes- you might as well not even be alone. Clarity really occurs when we’re left with our own thoughts. Our own body, and our own breath.
You’re likely already outside of your comfort zone, considering you’re in actual foreign territory- which is the perfect environment for expansion to occur. Think about it, your perspective is literally broadening with new cultures, foods, landscapes, and people. Your broader perspective is a great place for clarity to enter, because you have real SPACE for it now.
5 Tips For Solo Female Travelers
Who doesn’t want more confidence, freedom, and clarity? I know that I do! So, how can you enter into this experience in a grounded and practical manner, while maintaining room for fun and spontaneity.
Like so many things in life, it’s all about balance, baby. We want to balance the structure of planning with the fluidity of life on the road.
Dress Accordingly
I’m putting clothing first, because, let’s be real- what we wear is a huge part of the trip. Whether you’re into fashion and fun outfits, or prefer functional clothing over appearance- what you wear is an integral part of your travels.
Now, it’s obviously important to check the weather to make sure you’re comfortable while you’re traveling. But more importantly, you’ll want to look into any specific dress standards for the area you’re visiting.
For instance, whenever I visited a Muslim country like Pakistan I wanted to make sure I had loose pants and covered shoulders throughout the trip. The same sort of attire applied during my time spent in India. There were certain African countries I visited that were more conservative, although might not have explicit “rules” like a religious country might.
I know that this idea of dressing according to the culture is controversial in feminist spaces, because of the argument that we “should” be able to wear whatever we want. And if we adhere to rules that we don’t agree with, then we’re reinforcing patriarchal or misogynist ideals.
I disagree.
The reality is that you are a foreigner in this country. You’re a visitor. And visitors are meant to show up with respect. Plus, because you’re a foreigner, you probably look different than locals, which means you already stand out. Instead of drawing more attention to yourself with radical or what’s deemed as inappropriate clothing- try to blend in, instead.
I’m not saying it’s a woman’s fault if a man grabs her ass because she’s wearing leggings instead of loose, shapeless trousers. What I am saying is that the likelihood of these potentially unpleasant encounters does decrease the more you blend in. Dressing accordingly keeps women safe, and- in my opinion- that’s the priority.
Know Your Surroundings
It might sound like a no-brainer to remind you actually know where the heck you’re going, but I’ve also heard one too many traveler girlies think that Bali is a country, soooooo. Bali is actually a perfect example, because of its unique location and culture.
Spoiler alert, Bali is an island that’s a part of Indonesia. Indonesia is the country, Bali is just a piece of it. Indonesia is also predominantly Muslim, while Bali is predominantly Hindu. This is important because the difference between the two will impact what you wear, what you’ll eat, the architecture you’ll see, the gender roles in society, so on and so forth.
Some people might think that because Bali is in Indonesia that if they go to another island, it’s still okay to prance around in a bikini- when that’s actually a hard no in most places. It is vital to know your surroundings so that you can avoid putting yourself in a dangerous situation.
Maintain Constant Awareness
As women, we’re used to being alert basically at all times- so this shouldn’t be too hard to implement. No matter where you are in the world, it’s important to simply be aware of the setting you’re in (yes, this goes hand in hand with knowing your surroundings).
Depending on where you’re traveling, you might also not speak the same language as the locals. This means you’ll need to be paying even closer attention to body language, eye contact, and energy. Listen to your gut. It won’t lead you astray. You just need to actually tune in.
Remember, even if you’ve been in this new place for months now and feel totally comfortable- you still want to maintain awareness (like keeping your guard up) no matter where you are in the world. Oftentimes we’re hurt, taken advantage of, or infiltrated in some way when we let our guard down. Typically our guard lowers in the face of comfort.
So, allow yourself to settle in and BE comfy where you are- while also being alert and present with all that’s happening around you.
Fake Group Travel
This one is a favorite, and has definitely come in handy a time or two. I know plenty of solo female travelers who have faked a boyfriend, a husband, or even wore a ring on their wedding finger. Again, it’s not fair or right that sometimes the only way to gain respect is by acting like we’re the property of a man, but it does keep women safe. And that’s the priority.
If you don’t want a pretend beaux, then just act like you’re traveling with a group. For example, say you take a taxi back to your hotel after dinner. It’s dark out. The driver is friendly, but borderline a little TOO interested in you. You can’t get a full read whether this guy is a creep, or if you’re just a little tired and paranoid. You can easily drop in little nuggets about your friends waiting for you back at the hotel, or your travel buddy texting and asking where you are.
Whether the guy was an actual threat, or not, you’ve managed to create a protective barrier without being rude. He thinks there are people expecting you to arrive where he’s taking you. That paints a much different picture than you going back to a room alone.
Bottom line, as empowering as it might be to shout from the rooftops: I’M TRAVELING ALONE!
Please don’t do that.
Mindful Sharing Online
I know it’s tempting to share every single detail in real time. The cafes, the food, the flowers, the animals, the people. All of it! However, remember that if you’ve been documenting your journey as the epic solo quest that it is, someone can use that to their advantage in a way that might hurt or endanger you.
Trust me, I know this one from experience.
You can still share the vibrancy of your experience without putting yourself at risk. It’s easy.
-Avoid sharing where you are in real time.
This means if you’re at a cute restaurant with a delicious meal, post it after you actually eat it, and you’ve fully left the premises. The same thing goes for hotels, Airbnbs, and any other specific place that you may encounter on your trip.
-Use generalized geotags and tags.
Let’s say you can’t control that restaurant share when you’re eating in Ubud, Bali. You don’t know when you’ll have Wifi again, and want to take advantage of the connection in the cafe. Rather than tagging the specific restaurant, or even Ubud- just tag BALI. Or, even better, nothing at all.
-Don’t draw attention to being alone.
I’m not saying you need to fake like you’re with a group like you might with in-person interactions. Afterall, it’s typical for people to post photos of themselves on their own social media page. What I am suggesting is that rather than drawing attention to the solo nature of it all, wait to share about your experiences of traveling alone AFTER you’re done with your trip.
Are you ready for your next solo trip? I hope you’re feeling a little more confident to take the leap, because I know it’s going to be life changing for you.
Remember, blend in rather than stand out, do some research beforehand, a little awareness goes a long way, a little white lie about being with a group never hurt anyone, and tighten up the boundaries with what you share online while you’re on the go.
You’ve got this.
xx,
K
